Celebrate the end of 2017: A-List 12.27-1.2

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Perle Noire Clubesque

This week in post-Christmas fun we have options for New Year's Eve and other send-offs to the year that wasn't that great, 2017.

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Nate Abshire and Bryan Miller Brandon Simon

WEDNESDAY 12.27

Funnier Than Nate Abshire Featuring Bryan Miller
Acme Comedy Co.

“This year I’ve been focusing more on just doing standup,” says comedian Nate Abshire. “I’m just doing standup now, and it actually has made me a lot happier to just do what I do.” It’s not that he’s turning down work. “I feel like I used to get stressed out about trying to get my next TV credit and all that. I think that stuff is nice, but I’m trying to focus on each set and being in the moment because what I love about standup is the connection you get with all these people.” Nowadays, Abshire has a new mindset. “I believe we weren’t meant to have all these jobs and work and stuff. I think that unemployment is the natural state of man.” He’ll be taking the stage alongside friendly rival (and City Pages contributor) Bryan Miller. 18+. 8 p.m. Wednesday through Sunday; 10:30 p.m. Friday through Sunday. $15-$25. 708 N. First St., Minneapolis; 612-338-6393. Through Sunday —P.F. Wilson

Fuck 2017: A Roast of 2017
Turf Club

In 2017, everybody turned out to be a sexual predator, the president tried (and still is trying) to get the country blown up by “Little Rocket Man,” and the new Eminem album was horrible. Yeah, 2017 was a real dumpster fire... which is unfortunate as this time last year many thought that 2016 was the worst. We were so cute, so naive. This Wednesday, Rana May and Drew Janda will once again lead a hilarious lineup of comics—including Carly Wicks, Mary Jo Pehl, Tommy Ryman, Moe Yaqub, Jordan Casner, Grace Thomas, and John Gebratatose—as they reflect on how 2017 was the year we learned that Garrison Keillor was a pervy tool, Kevin Spacey’s house of cards came crashing down for real, and that kid who broke our hearts crying over bullying turned out to be the spawn of white supremacists. DJ Paper Sleeves will do his best to keep things upbeat despite the fact that this is one part comedy show, one part funeral, and one part intervention. Come laugh, cry, get drunk, and do your best to put this year in the rearview before we move on to whatever new horrors await us in 2018. 21+. 7:30 p.m. $7. 1601 University Ave. W., St. Paul; 651-647-0486. —Patrick Strait

The 2017 Minnesota Year-in-Review Quiz Show
Bryant-Lake Bowl Theater

Who was the MVP of the WNBA Finals this year? What exactly is Bitcoin? What was the movie called where the Rock took off his shirt? (Trick question: All of them. Animated ones, too.) If you love trivia, pop culture, and LOLs, Tane Danger and Dennis Curley from the Theater of Public Policy have you covered. They’ll be putting a celebrity panel of six of their funniest friends to the test, quizzing them on the biggest events of the past year in Minnesota and beyond. With swamp draining, public protests, Netflix binges, and celebrity feuds to cover, the hosts will test their knowledge while looking back on the biggest events of the past 12 months. As with game shows like Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me…or Q.I., you’ll laugh, think, and cringe along with the contestants. Even if there are no prizes, there’s no greater feeling than knowing the answer to a meaningless question about the latest Fast & Furious movie. 7 p.m. $15. 810 W. Lake St., Minneapolis; 612-825-3737. —Patrick Strait

Steve Simeone
Rick Bronson’s House of Comedy

“I don’t exactly know what audiences want,” admits comedian Steve Simeone, “but I know what I like to do and I just like to look for the little things in life that can be celebrated, because it’s so easy now to be negative.” Simeone wants to talk about what’s good in life. “What makes life worth living,” he adds. “Let’s put politics aside for a second and recognize each other’s humanity and what we have in common. And the best things in life are these shared moments.” Simeone is known for talking about nostalgia, but that’s just a leaping-off point. “These things were great when you were a kid, but it’s even better now, because you can still celebrate them as an adult.” A bit he does on ordering pizza is an example. “It’s about how when I was a kid that was a huge treat. Friday night pizza night. It was like getting Christmas delivered to your house.” 16+. 7:30 p.m. Wednesday through Friday; 9:45 p.m. Friday; 7 p.m. Saturday and Sunday; 9:30 p.m. Saturday; 9 p.m. Sunday. $13-$55.95. 408 E. Broadway, Mall of America, Bloomington; 952-858-8558. Through Sunday —P.F. Wilson

THURSDAY 12.28

New Year’s Noire
The Lab Theater

Make your New Year’s appropriately lavish by treating yourself to some luscious moves, shimmering spectacle, stunning feats, and a few laughs. New Year’s Noire will take over the Lab Theater for four nights, with emcee Nadine DuBois holding court at each installment. To produce the engagement, DuBois partnered with Electra Cute and New York-based burlesque performer Perle Noire. She’ll be performing along with House of Noire “gems” Poison Ivory and Pearls Daily each night. Enjoy the elegance, seduction, top-tier talent, and innuendo all the way into 2018 as bawdy jokes, sexy dancing, scintillating costumes, and ambience to die for combine for a divine experience. Premium cocktail table seats include a meet-and-greet photo opportunity with the cast after the show. 8 p.m. Thursday through Sunday. $20-$40; $30-$60 VIP. 700 First St. N., Minneapolis; 612-333-3377. Through Sunday —Sheila Regan

Dave Williamson 
Joke Joint Comedy Club

“When I was a kid, I didn’t know it was a job path you could have,” says Dave Williamson of a career in standup comedy. “I thought it was something on TV that people lucked into. But I liked being the funny guy in high school and college.” Williamson, who grew up in Miami, was an only child, but he never lacked an audience. “We used to have tons of family and friends over to the house for dinner all the time. I think that led me down a path too because I’d watch my Italian mother tell all these stories and be loud and funny. And my grandmother was always a great exaggerator, so I grew up around a bunch of great storytellers.” Williamson relocated to Los Angeles a few years into his standup career. “I felt like I’d done everything I could do in Florida.... It’s hard to tour when you’re that far south.” New York wasn’t an option. “There was no way I was going to talk my wife into going to New York. We’re a tropical climate kind of people.” 7:30 p.m. Thursday through Sunday; 9:45 p.m. Friday through Sunday. $14-$29. 801 Sibley Memorial Hwy., Lilydale; 651-330-9078. Through Sunday —P.F. Wilson

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Image courtesy event organizers

FRIDAY 12.29

Happy Crazy New Year 7
Phoenix Theater

Happy Crazy New Year is back again with a wild, interactive show and party. This year’s installment tells the story of a nightclub that may have to close after its star, Mister Snuffles, passes away. It’s a production filled with “terrible photoshop, overly elaborate life insurance extortion schemes, dancing, slapstick, and dogs.” In addition to the gripping pup-related plot, an impromptu dance party can spring up at any moment. Literally. Anyone in the audience is welcome to head onstage at any time during the show to click the “Dance Party Button,” sending the cast, crew, and audience into a one-minute whirlwind of movement. “These shows are insane,” says cast member Garrett Vollmer. “Everything starts pretty normal, and then an hour later I’m backstage, dressed as the pope, getting my hair cut by an audience member.” Sounds like a good time. Tickets are available at at dangerousproductions.org. All ages. 9:30 p.m. Friday through Sunday. $13-$18. 2605 Hennepin Ave., Minneapolis; 612-377-2285. Through Sunday —Jessica Armbruster

SATURDAY 12.30

Lizz Winstead in 2017: The Greatest Sh*t Show On Earth
The Cedar Cultural Center

In our troubling times, humor can be hard to find, which is precisely why Lizz Winstead’s annual recaps are so fulfilling. The homegrown comic and co-creator (along with Madeline Smithberg) of The Daily Show has an instinct for absurdities, insightfully drawing forth the sublimely ridiculous nature of our dystopian moment. Joined by musical guest Sam Breckenridge, Winstead will brave the ludicrous depths of 2017, seeking laughter in the events that have left so many of us feeling utterly shell-shocked. Indeed, with each passing day bringing the promise of another outrage, Winstead will undoubtedly need to call upon all of her skills as a humorist, allaying exhaustion with levity and perhaps even shoring up a dogged degree of optimism for the approaching year. All ages. 2 p.m. Saturday; 7:30 p.m. Saturday and Sunday. $45/$55; $65 VIP. 416 Cedar Ave. S., Minneapolis; 612-338-2674. Through Sunday —Brad Richason

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Darin Kamnetz

SUNDAY 12.31

Flip Phone Presents: 2018 – The Party
First Avenue

This year was a gloomy one. We might as well celebrate the death of 2017 with a seedy, glam, and raucous party. Flip Phone’s end-of-year bash at First Avenue will be filled with drag, music, dancing, and booze. Season-three winner Raja and two-time runner up Raven from RuPaul’s Drag Race will be performing onstage, and special guests include Julia Starr, Tygra Slarii, and Magic Dyke. DBaz will provide music. This shindig should be a sure bet for folks looking for an affordable but super fun night out. 18+. 9 p.m. to 2 a.m. $30/$35 doors; $50 VIP. 701 First Ave. N., Minneapolis; 612-338-8388. —Jessica Armbruster 

Gold Party/Polynesian Passport
Betty Danger’s/Psycho Suzi’s

 

Looking for a party that is a little bit glam, a little campy, and pretty cheap? Consider hitting up Betty Danger’s Country Club or its sister bar, Psycho Suzi’s Motor Lounge. At Betty Danger’s (2501 Marshall St. NE, Minneapolis; 612-315-4997), $45 scores you three cocktails of your choice and a champagne toast at midnight. As you count down the hours, take a ride on the Ferris wheel, dance to disco tunes from DJ Shiek, and snap photos in Betty’s super photogenic space. Gold attire is encouraged here. Meanwhile, over at Psycho Suzi’s (1900 Marshall St. NE, Minneapolis; 612-788-9069), $45 gets you four drinks. Choose from the tiki menu or a premium cocktail, beer, or wine. Order up some food or take to the dance floor as DJs Brownie and Strangelove entertain. Stop by the photobooth to commemorate the evening, even if things get a little warm and fuzzy toward the end. 21+. 9 p.m. to 1 a.m. $45. —Jessica Armbruster

East Coast Style New Year’s Eve Comedy Show
Sisyphus Brewing

If you’re someone who loves comedy, celebrations, and reasonable bedtimes, Maggie Faris is your girl. For the fourth year in a row, Faris will host her East Coast Style Comedy Show alongside comedians Jeff Pfoser, Chloe Radcliffe, and Kate Anderson. The thing that makes this happening great is that they do the full-blown New Year’s hoopla on the East Coast clock. That means you’re throwing confetti and tongue-kissing strangers at 11 p.m. here in Minnesota. You’ll still have time to get home, wash the last of 2017 off yourself, and snuggle into your warm bed before the clock hits midnight. As in past years, there will be booby prizes and beer (because, you know, Sisyphus is a brewery). However, what makes this year different is that it will also serve as a CD-release party for Faris, who will be celebrating her sophomore album, A Dingus Among Us. For those who feel like 11 p.m. is still too late but want to celebrate like the cool kids, there is also an early show with all the pomp and circumstance, so you can get home and relieve your babysitter before the primetime New Year’s Eve rates kick in. Tickets and more info can be found at www.brownpapertickets.com. 21+. 7 and 9 p.m. $25. 712 Ontario Ave. W., Minneapolis; 612-321-8324. —Patrick Strait

A-List Only
Trylon Cinema

When Trylon microcinema opened in 2009, success was far from a sure thing. Defying skeptics, the shoebox theater proved a resounding success by offering an intelligently curated blend of the familiar and the obscure, drawing upon big-budget Hollywood fare, scrappy independent productions, and international creations. The space underwent extensive renovations last summer to expand capacity. Dropping the “micro” from its moniker, the newly re-christened Trylon Cinema is celebrating with A-List Only, a nine-film series consisting of previously screened classics, all of which sold out over their earlier runs. That includes Charade (1963), All About Eve (1950), Mulholland Drive (2001), The Big Sleep (1946), Clue (1985), Lawrence of Arabia (1962), La Dolce Vita (1960), Dr. Strangelove (1964), and Barry Lyndon(1975). Whether viewing these works for the first time or the 50th, there’s no finer environment to witness their mastery than within this oasis of cinema. Visit www.trylon.org for schedule. $8. 3258 Minnehaha Ave. S., Minneapolis; 612-424-5468. Through January 30, 2018 —Brad Richason

Down the Rabbit Hole
Hewing Hotel

These days, the world is a confusing place. Hewing Hotel’s Alice in Wonderland-themed party, Down the Rabbit Hole, should also be confusing—but in a good way. During this strange soirée, revelers will enjoy a quirky atmosphere with much to puzzle over, as contortionists and acrobats share their mind-boggling talents. Enter Mad Tea Party-mode with specialty cocktails and snack on appetizers big and small. Sarah White will provide the music, and there will also be a champagne toast at midnight. Be sure to check out package deals if you’d like to spend the night in Wonderland. Tickets and more info at www.eventbrite.com. 9 p.m. to 2 a.m. $100. 300 N. Washington Ave., Minneapolis; 866-501-3300. —Jessica Armbruster

New Year’s Eve Family-Friendly Celebration
Afton Alps

The words “family-friendly” get tossed around pretty loosely when it comes to New Year’s Eve. Yes, you can let your kids run wild through a TGI Friday’s for three hours while you get blasted on mudslides, but that’s not really family nor friendly. Afton Alps is hosting its annual New Year’s Eve celebration, an event that is legitimately fun for families. Shred the slopes throughout the day, then enjoy evening happenings including hillside fireworks, a massive bonfire, food specials, a bounce house, and s’mores. For the grownups, there will be live music from Triple Dog Dare (which is the most family-friendly band name ever) from 9 p.m. until 12:30 a.m., and the ski lifts will be up and running until the ball drops at midnight. To commemorate the epic evening, you’ll earn a “Party Like It’s 1999” pin just for riding the lift. No matter what your definition of “family-friendly” is, there’s going to be something you and your kids will enjoy at Afton Alps. Plus, TGI Friday’s will still be there all year long. 9:30 a.m. to midnight. Admission to this event is included with lift tickets. 6600 Peller Ave. S., Hastings; 651-436-5245. —Patrick Strait


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